Saturday, Pete and I got down the Christmas decorations and Pete set up the tree and lights. [Didn’t we just put them away?? -pw]. We didn’t finish because I had a lovely afternoon tea at church and our friend from Israel spoke and we sang Christmas carols, and it was wonderful fun.
I think I may have had too much sweets though, because I ended up with a headache with nausea. It could be the weather too, because I tend to get headaches with the weather change. We need this rain none-the-less.
On Saturday morning, I tried on my dressy clothes to decide what to wear for the Women’s Networking Christmas party on Tuesday evening. I am finally going to do something with networking again after all this. I am quite excited. I wasn’t too happy with the way my clothes were though. Because I still have my medi-port on my chest and the ugly scar, I can not wear necklines that show it because it isn’t very attractive. I feel like I don’t have anything to wear. Even my clothes that had a higher neckline were of knit fabric that you could still see the bump on the chest. I might just have to bear with it, and if people notice it, it is what it is. People need to be aware of cancer, and maybe it is a wake up call to others I suppose. It just doesn’t feel very attractive to expose something like that at a gala activity.
Today, Sunday, I remembered one other dress in the closet, and although it is a black sundress, it is dressy and would meet all my requirements for the Christmas party. I can wear my shawl, and I am set! I am so glad. It would have been fun to get a new updated dress, but I really didn’t want to spend the money right now with Christmas coming and I am still paying off medical bills. I don’t need to spend it one a fancy dress now. Yes!
Today, Pete woke up with a cold, and I was struggling with my headache still, so we both stayed home from church and are laying low. It is raining constantly, so it makes for a quiet restful day at that.
Again, I am happy that I found something that will work for the party on Tuesday evening. Shopping in the closet is a great thing.
I wonder when the doctor is going to take the port out? The surgeon told me that they want me to keep it in just in case for a while. She didn’t give me a time frame, so it is a mystery to me. Even when it comes out when they determine I am “cancer free”, I will still have the scar. What was I thinking when I ok’d it? I guess at the time, I knew I just didn’t want my veins in my arm getting the brunt of the harsh chemotherapy drugs. My veins sometimes can be a challenge, I didn’t want them to collapse and my veins ruined in my arm. Being a nurse in Oncology in the past, I have seen the results and I based my decisions on that. Even now my medi-port gives the nurses a run for their money because it is positional and hard to even draw blood from, so I know it was still a good idea at the time. The other thing is I made the decisions because I wanted to do the best thing to get rid of the cancer. This is my year to get well.